“The mouth has three gatekeepers. Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?” Arab proverb
With my husband on his journey to re-class into a combat job in the Air Force I get a lot of negativity from friends, customers, and strangers about this life style we have chosen to go through together. The training for the career he wants to get into is almost two years long plus extensions for different certifications he needs, so without being said that is a lot of time being away from each other. That information alone plus the word combat brings on a list of comments I have to hear.
- “You’re going to be a widow soon”
- “You or your husband are going to cheat on the other from not seeing each other all the time”
- “You are going to get wandering eyes”
- “He’s stupid for picking this career with a wife and your stupid for agreeing to it”
What kind of remarks are these?!? Why spew negative comments to the family that has a serviceman/woman so willing to do the job that not many others are willing to do? Support? Right out the window. I’m not looking for sympathy or to be pitied. But I am definitely not looking for such negative comments putting my marriage down and the courage my husband (and others) have to go out and fight for this country.
Being a military wife one doesn’t think that I already fear for the deployments he has to go on. Or the distance that I know is inevitable. I don’t let these comments stick, just in one ear and out the other. As a team we know what we are capable of and no distance or deployment or job will come between us.
No one should say such hurtful things to anyone or assume they know how the future will turn out for another human being. Be mindful. Put yourself in their shoes. And let’s support one another on this crazy journey we call life!