What an emotional past several weeks it has been. It comes down to hubby being away for work. Having to get used to being alone.
The first couple weeks were hard and don’t get me wrong it’s no walk in the park now but much easier to manage.
I have never been alone. I grew up with a twin sister, who I was inseparable with. We did everything together. The best of friends so it was not uncommon to have the same friend groups, go shopping together etc. The first semester out of high school we attended the same college, so carpooling and staying late to study together was a thing.
Then, right after the first semester ended I got married to my high school sweet heart and moved several states away so he can pursue his career. So I was never out on my own.
He was always there to eat dinner with even if we were on different day/night schedules we made it work. Someone to go to bed with and wake up next to. Someone to hold you to put you back together after a long day.
Now I eat by myself. I put my own pieces back together, or at least I’m trying. Thankfully, I have my two puppers to go to bed with and wake up to. For two dachshunds they take up more room then my husband does!
So, in this time I had to find what works for me.
When we are together I tend to be a chatter box, so the silence of being able to only talk to yourself is different. I love to go on coffee dates, breakfast or dinner dates, walk on the beach together, always doing something with the hubbs, so it’s different when he’s not around.
I’m so glad I’ve been into fitness for the past three years because I don’t know what I would do without it. A good 45-90 minutes at the gym does the body and soul good. I honestly don’t know why or how I would let myself skip out on the gym some days when I just wasn’t feeling it. My mood would drastically change on days I didn’t get my workout in. I wasn’t just doing my body harm physically by not going but mentally as well. So I learned to lace up my shoes grab my headphones and move some way so I can feel better. Even if that means going for 30 minutes of cardio if I don’t want to strength train that day.
I am never one to stick to getting my nails done. I do it for an occasion then let them chip away until they are gone. I know! The horror! But with hubbs away going to get my nails done, pampering myself, getting out of the house, does me good. It’s relaxing and socializing. Plus I go to a family owned nail salon so there are babies running around everywhere, if that don’t put a smile on your face I don’t know what will!
Journaling! This one is a big one. For words I can’t speak or thoughts I can’t get out of my head, writing it down helps me think clearer. There are some thoughts I don’t want to converse about so just by writing them down can help get them off my heart. Some days it’s just a paragraph while other days I fill up multiple pages.
Ever since I was younger I used a book to escape from reality. Some nights I’ll open a book to let the characters do the talking for me. Get lost in another world. Right now I’m in Nantucket with a sister and a best friend.
I don’t ever watch tv unless I feel like binging Greys Anatomy every now and then. So to fill the silence I’ll put on a podcast. They help lift up your mood and get your gears turning, opening yourself up to what you are capable of. Obviously I listen to the self help, health and wellness, and fitness topic podcast if you couldn’t tell, haha. (Plan on doing a post of my favorite podcasts soon so stay tuned!)
Having amazing friends help too! Getting lost in different adventures, talking in coffee shops til our bellies are full, going for drives, just enjoying each other’s company is also good for the soul. Having a good support group is so important. Plus, hubby’s friends been calling to check in and meet up so I stay busy. Very thankful for them!
A major key I’ve learned is to let yourself feel the emotions you are going through. Feel them but don’t let them dictate your day or ruin a conversation. Emotions are normal and part of the human experience. It’s good to feel them, acknowledge them, then let them go so they don’t way you down.